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Why Life Is Like a Jar of Coconut Oil

By July 13, 2016December 29th, 2020No Comments
coconut oil

Coconut oil

Sandy grabbed the jar of coconut oil and headed to the stove. It would only take her about 5 minutes to brown the meat and throw something together for the kids. She’d totally lost track of time and now the kids weren’t just hungry, they were HANGRY!

Quickly unscrewing the lid, she tossed it on the counter while grabbing a knife.

“Who needs a knife,” she giggled.

There in the jar was a puddle of liquid. She tilted the jar and let a bit flow into her pan. Easy to use.

Funny. Yesterday it was a solid mass.

That got her thinking about her kids’ behavior.

Yesterday everything felt wearisome and hard. They sniped at each other, little irritations sparked shouting matches. Small offenses caused major emotional eruptions accompanied by a flood of tears. Sandy played referee more times than she could count. Quiet time was non-existent. A challenging day overall.

Today was more liquid. Easy. Flowing. The outside temperature was perfect Sandy thought. Warm but not too warm, with a gentle breeze. The kids were playing well together outside. It was an easy day.

Sandy sighed with relief. How she needed a day like today! Easy and flowing, which is probably why she’d lost track of time.

Maybe where you live, coconut oil is always liquid. Not where I live. Temperature greatly affects the liquidity of the oil. If it’s on the cool side, the oil is solid. But, when temps climb during the summer, the oil becomes, well, oil.

Our emotions, and those of our kids, are ever-changing. Some days we are smooth, easy-going, and fluid; other days we are grumpy, stubborn, and definitely rocky.

What causes the change in emotional temperature?

  1. Physically. How well you sleep and how long you sleep affects your emotional state. If you are physically in pain, or not feeling well, your emotions will be more tenuous. Have you binged on sweets or too much of something you know isn’t good for you?
  2. Mentally. Are you distracted because you’ve allowed too much on your plate for this day? Do you have a looming deadline that carries with it a lot of stress? Are you in the middle of a conflict with your spouse or child? Mental fatigue affects your emotions.
  3. Spiritually. Have you allowed other important distractions to crowd out your time in reading the Bible, meditating, and praying? When we neglect spending time enriching our soul our emotions suffer.

Kids face the same health needs we parents do. Therefore, the next time your kids are sniping at each other, take a moment to think over the last day or so.

  • Has their routine been significantly interrupted in any way?
  • Has their sleep not been restful or long enough?
  • Have they attended a lot of parties where they filled up on sweets and junk food?
  • Have they spent more time watching TV, videos, or playing computer related games than exerting physical exercise?

We are complex beings with many parts. Each of them interdependent on the other to remain healthy. When one of these four areas – physical, mental, spiritual, or emotional – is out of sync, the others suffer as well.

What would you say your liquidity level is today? What about your kids? If today seems like solid coconut oil, I encourage you to evaluate and adjust.

Maybe it’s time to simply enjoy the sunshine.

Capture the extra-ordinary in the ordinary,

Kirsten D. Samuel
Aftershock Recovery Coach
8-week Program, Custom-paced Coaching, Remote, or In-person Sessions





  • Kirsten D Samuel

    I empower Christian wives to discover they are seen, loved, and heard. These women find the freedom to be who they are beyond their partner’s struggles, and find hope that there is a life worth living.