Do you have a friend who likes the play the “pick one” game? It seems like at every job there’s that co-worker who incessantly peppers everyone with questions like, “If you could take only one album to a desert island, which one would you take?” and “Your fridge can only hold three meals for the rest of your life, which three meals would you eat over and over?” Some of my co-workers had ready answers. However, I labored over my selections each time. One album? For the rest of my life? I thought about his questions for days afterward. I wonder why I chaffed at the push to “pick one” and not others? Do you welcome those questions, or do you join me in my dilemma?
Depending on the day, time of year, or even time of day, I like to read and listen to different selections. So, picking just one album, book, or snack to satisfy me forever creates an itchy challenge for me.
Now faced with the desire to share with you the “top ten” blogs from my site, I thought I might feel the same pressure to “pick one.” Fortunately, when I look back over the near-200 blogs I’ve written over the past six years, I have analytic tools that tell me the top ten. Yay! No selection and desert island required. The data shows me my most read blogs.
I can see the numbers, but I don’t take that to mean they were my most impactful. A blog may have resonated with many, which I appreciate, but it’s that one blog that lifts the fog for that one person that is enough for me. So, can I pick one as my favorite?
Yes. I choose that! My favorite is the one blog (or several blogs) that made a difference in your life during a difficult time. Here are some of my most read blogs:
1. Are You Ignoring These 5 Porn Addiction Warning Signs In Your Husband?
What are you ignoring in your marriage? What warning light do you see blinking in the distance or flashing brightly in your face? But you’re ignoring it? You only need one to know you need to pay attention. It’s easy to ignore warning signs that are right in front of us. Either we focus on something else and completely miss the signs, or we rationalize that we’re over-reacting. I learned the hard way. I ignored…
2. 10 Warning Signs If You Suspect Your Husband Is Watching Porn
The evidence stared at Nanci*, almost defying her to accept it. She turned away, repulsed, sickened at the knowledge her husband was watching porn. (Names changed to provide anonymity. “How could he?” she raged. Then, tears fell. Hot agonizing spasms burst from deep within her soul. “He promised he’d stopped!” Stunned, angry, wounded, Nanci continued to…
3. Can You Ever Trust Your Husband Again?
Has your husband ever lied to you? Did you forgive him? And then wonder why your heart still hurt? Why you still felt angry? Forgiveness and trust are not the same. Forgiveness is a gift you offer someone who has wronged you. But trust is not a gift that can be handed right back. Trust builds over time. Do you ask yourself…
4. What To Do When Someone Gives You Dead Roses
When Dad and Mom came out, Dad said, “Thanks for cleaning the car, Kelly. It looks great. But you missed a huge streak on the window. It’s right here in my line of vision.” Kelly’s joy disappeared like a puff of smoke. “Really? That’s all Dad saw? The one spot I didn’t get quite right? I worked hard to do something nice without being asked, and he didn’t appreciate it.” Without realizing it, Kelly took a vow that day that would follow her for years.
5. 6 Reasons Why Pornography Was NOT Able To Destroy My Marriage
According to an interview with over 350 divorce attorneys, internet porn played a significant role in 60% of divorces. And Huffington Post estimates “at least 30% of all data transferred across the internet is porn-related.” All data. Those Statistics Are Staggering, But Not Surprising. My marriage contributed to the statistics. My husband was addicted to pornography. That was almost 12 years ago. We are…
6. 5 Things You Don’t Want to Learn About Pornography Addiction In Court
In a recent real-life courtroom experience, I realized there are things you don’t want to learn about pornography addiction in court. Let me explain. Her pain and fear wracked her heaving body. Tears flooded the eyes of helpless onlookers. Except his. He stared forward. Emotionless, seemingly untouched by her uncontrolled vomiting while the rest of the courtroom gasped.
7. 3 Ways To Strengthen Your Marriage After You Have Kids
One conversation most couples have before marriage or early in their marriage deals with children. Do you want children? How many? When? But one thing couples rarely discuss is how they will strengthen their marriage after having kids. That’s not surprising. Unless someone prompts you…
8. When You Want To Scream: How To Recover From Your Spouse’s Betrayal
Betrayal, in any form, deeply wounds your heart, spirit, and soul. But betrayal from your spouse cuts into bone, crushes your spirit, and rips a ginormous hole in your heart. You don’t want to believe the words. Ignoring the signs, you excuse behavior you know in your gut is abnormal. If you can relate, I’m sorry. No one deserves betrayal, yet everyone faces it…
9. Do Your Emotional Scars Make You Stronger?
Every morning my ritual involves applying oil and massaging the most recent surgical scars. Why? To soften the scar tissue, increase circulation to heal the surgical site further, stretch the injured skin to alleviate the tension, and hopefully lessen the ugly, purple stripe across my leg. Along with this ritual comes gratitude. The scar reminds me that…
10. 10 Proven Ways To Reconnect with Your Husband After You’ve Been Hurt
Like a dry twig snapping in half, my connection with my husband severed. Our years of “normal” life cracked right down the middle with splinters everywhere when he confessed he might be fired because he’d been caught looking at porn. My kind, funny, sweet, Christian husband had a secret porn addiction for years, and now here we were. It felt like an earthquake struck the center of our home.
Did I leave one of your favorites off the list? Do you share my distaste for the “pick one” game? If so, I’d love to hear about it.
Thank you for all of your love and support for my blog. My heart longs to offer something each week that will help you. I ask God to help me “pick one” and show me what to write about in hopes that hurting wives will know they are not alone. Pornography addiction is pervasive. If your husband is addicted to pornography, you are not alone—and there is hope! We found ways to save our marriage, keep our family intact, and live a better, fuller life. Hope and healing are available to you.