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Trust and Control: Why They Can’t Coexist in a Healthy Relationship

Betrayal recovery is tricky business. Just when you believe you’ve made progress, something trips you. It could be small or large—doesn’t matter. You find […]

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What Is Love, Really? 5 Codes To Unlocking A Marriage That Lasts

What kind of love keeps you married for 70 years? In a world of quick exits, I’ve observed three couples married for at least […]

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The Quiet Power Of Cherishing Your Spouse—Even When It’s Hard

They slid into the booth in my direct sight. He eased her coat from her thin shoulders while she gave him a Duchenne smile […]

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The Messy Middle Of Betrayal Doesn’t Have To Break You–Here’s How To Break Through

Nine months or so into our recovery from betrayal trauma and depression, the process felt muddy. Never-ending. The hope from the beginning dimmed. We […]

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Flash Points, Freeze Points, And Forgiveness: How To Set Yourself Free

You and I have explored many topics about getting through the initial betrayal discovery and crisis. When you’re in those first moments where you […]

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From Wounded To Whole: Healing One Small Choice At A Time

Benjamin Franklin quipped: “Watch the little things; a small leak will sink a great ship.” As Dave and I worked through the betrayal trauma […]

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When Heaven Sang: A Simple Lesson From The Angels’ Worship

It's Christmas week! Merry Christmas. When Heaven Sang Let's look at one final group in the Christmas story—the chorus of angels. We know they […]

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3 Ways to Embrace God’s Wonder This Christmas

In 2020, while our world suffered a global pandemic, one storyteller released The Wonder Switch, a book that dared you to flip your wonder […]

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Simplify Your Season: Let Go of the ‘Shoulds’ This Christmas

Mom made Christmas magical with beautiful decorations, welcoming aromas, and plenty of candlelight. She seemed to navigate the Christmas season with ease and grace. […]

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The Secret to Discover Joy After Betrayal: Reclaim the Holidays for Yourself

Happy Holidays! Merry Christmas! Happy Hannukah! Cheery faces surrounded by sparkling lights. Somehow, people find a new level of kindness this time of year. […]

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Why Won’t He Change? Embracing Your Freedom And Healing By Letting Go

Why won’t he change? Betrayal recovery is hard enough. But when your partner seems disinterested in leaving behind destructive behaviors like watching porn, you […]

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A Thanksgiving Chorus: Let Gratitude Be Your Song

This Thanksgiving, as you prepare, travel, enjoy delicious foods, laugh, cry, please find time to nurture your soul with gratitude. Even if you are […]

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✨ The Thanksgiving That Changed Everything—And Why I Am Grateful

In Chicago, the news is buzzing with special holiday trains getting ready to leave various stations. This annual event invites people to ride with […]

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Why Did I Stay After Betrayal? 3 Embarrassing Reasons I Hesitated to Share

Recently, a few people asked me a fantastic question. “Why did you stay?” My answer is quite simple. I didn’t want to be another […]

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Betrayal Trauma And The Joy Center: How Daily Gratitude Practice Heals The Brain

During some recent training on brain neuroscience and understanding the wounded heart, Dr. Marcus Warner taught about the “way to grow joy.” I couldn’t […]

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Jesus Sees You: A Story of Redemption, Honor, and Love

Voices echoed. The wait staff scurried with their chores. The staff opened the windows because of the oppressive desert heat, attempting to catch any […]

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Breaking Free From A Stony Heart: 2 Steps To Healing After Betrayal Trauma

We called my sister the “heart freak.”  Born the day before Valentine’s Day and on our grandfather’s birthday, she collected heart-related things and loved […]

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From Guilt to Grace: Discovering Healing After Destructive Decisions

Zara wondered what Zeke wanted. It had been years since they’d talked. After Zeke and Char’s wedding, they’d moved to the next town. Neither […]

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Breaking Free from the Mask: The Dangers of Faking It

In a world that often pressures us to present a perfect façade, the power of sharing personal stories—especially those of struggle and recovery—can't be […]

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Why Transformational Recovery Outlasts Our Quick-Fix World

Imagine you and me sitting together over coffee, chatting about the messy, painful reality of betrayal trauma. Facing the aftermath of discovering your partner's […]

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Overcoming Rumination (Thoughts On Replay): 3 Powerful Steps To Reclaim Your Mind

Have you ever had an internal imaginary argument with someone? Maybe it was after a highly emotional confrontation. Perhaps it was with your boss […]

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What If He Never Stops? Navigating The Pain Of Betrayal

What if he never stops looking at porn? A haunting question. One that causes soul anguish for the wife whose husband struggles with porn. […]

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You Can Conquer The Sense Of Betrayal To Build Trust And True Forgiveness

A sense of betrayal—one of the devastating aftershocks of discovering your husband’s porn struggle. These questions dig deep gouges in your mind. How can […]

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Finding Hope After Betrayal: 3 Must-Haves For Your Healing Journey

Belle sat stunned. “Belle, you have to believe me. I promise it’ll never happen again! You’ve got to believe me. Please. Belle?” She couldn’t […]

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What Sitcoms Teach Us About Honest Communication In Marriage

Why do well-written sitcoms make us laugh? Shows like Seinfeld, Everybody Loves Raymond, and Home Improvement exaggerate real-life stories. Kaylee Gadepalli, in her March […]

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5 Ways You Feel Safe In Your Relationship: Post-Betrayal Healing

Can you ever feel safe again? When you discover your partner’s struggle with porn, you lose your sense of security. Part of that damage […]

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Deconstructing the Lie: “What’s Wrong With Me?”

Janet* sobbed. Overwhelmed by fear, pain, remorse, and inadequacy, she choked on her next words, “What’s wrong with me?” For the next several moments, […]

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When Your Heart Hurts: 3 Hazards to Avoid on Your Path to Recovery

When your heart hurts, you’ll do almost anything to stop the pain so you may not recognize a few hazards. The first time I […]

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5 Keys to Developing Empathy and Emotional Attunement

In the previous blog, we defined and discussed empathy and emotional attunement. Check it out here. If you struggle with empathy and emotional attunement, […]

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Confessions of an Emotionally Disconnected Mind: Navigating the Journey to Empathy

I have a confession to make. As a human, I’m not always empathetic or emotionally attuned to others. 😢😳 Identifying with the emotions of […]

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3 Key Characteristics Of a Sister-Friend You Need For Your Successful Betrayal Recovery

So many questions bombard the wife of a man struggling with porn’s grip on his mind, body, and soul. How do you find the […]

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Hiding A Secret? How To Know It’s Time To Open Up

When was the last time you whispered something in another person’s ear that you didn’t want anyone else to hear? Secrets. We all have […]

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Want more than work-life balance? See what Jesus did

Relationships impact your life and work. When I first started in the business world, I felt obligated to keep my work and personal life […]

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3 Key Takeaways When Life Interrupts Your Plans

How do you cope when life interrupts your carefully made plans? Last fall, God brought a shake-up to our lives. Another one. And let […]

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The Mess of Betrayal: 3 Ways to Unpack and Heal

Who wants to admit their life is a mess? Discovering weaknesses in yourself never feels good. I stood at the door, overwhelmed by boxes, […]

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10 Belief Shifts To Redefine You And Your Recovery

Recently, I met with a new coach. From experience, I get out of these coaching sessions what I put into them. I knew this […]

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